Make Networking a Mindset Habit – Not a Goal


Your mindset and attitude about how you approach specific situations influence your behavior. And your response to certain thoughts and perspective on circumstances will also have an impact on others.

What you put into something, is what you’ll get out of it. And keeping your mindset focused on success will help you achieve just that.

Cultivate Your Mindset (and make it a habit)

Here’s an example for you: my friend Larry, President of Arkus, originally set a personal goal to finish reading 20 books a year. He then adjusted this to aim at reading an average of 10 pages per night. And guess what? Instead of his initial objective to reach 20, he now reads around 35 books yearly.

And he owes this result to adjusting his daily habit – as opposed to focusing on hitting an annual goal.

Our actions and customs are habits that we routinely follow. And rather than concentrating on big-time goals, think about altering these habits instead; this will create long-term success, whereas goals can sometimes be very short-term in nature.

Habits are about rewiring your brain to help you make small changes that lead to long-lasting and life-altering improvements. You can’t control everything! But you can control how you think, and the frame of mind you’re in. As the Buddhist saying goes, “What you think, you become.” Refining your current habits will increase your spheres of influence, and make you a better networker.

Just as Larry transformed his thinking from a total number of books a year to an average number of pages per night, you can change your mindset and perspective in your own actions, especially when it comes to networking and building relationships.

“People do not decide their futures, they decide their habits and their habits decide their futures.”

F.M Alexander

Let’s say you set yourself a goal to establish a certain number of new contacts a week; make an adjustment, and instead commit to a routine of carving out 30 minutes a day and practice the Power-Half Hour to connect with a specific number of new people on LinkedIn. Or rather than aiming to complete a few training courses a year or gain certifications to increase your skills and knowledge, set goals to take one per quarter. I’ll bet you will notice a difference!

Keeping a constructive daily routine helps define your day and puts you in the right state of mind, ultimately helping you obtain your relationship-building goals. You must establish positive habits in order to be successful.

Your Approach to Networking Determines Opportunities You’re Given

If you think networking is a waste of time and nothing will come of it, then you know what? That’s what will happen. But if you shift your mindset and go into it with an open mind and a sense of excitement around the possibilities waiting for you, it will be a better experience, and you’ll develop valuable connections where you learn from each other.

Here’s another example: you ran the New York City marathon, and finished last. But you know what? You still come out ahead of the millions of people that didn’t even attempt to run. Just think how far ahead of the game you are when you learn a positive networking mindset. There is such a small amount of people that foster this way of thinking, and if you take it upon yourself to adjust the way you build relationships, you will develop robust networks.

“Willpower isn’t just a skill. It’s a muscle, like the muscles in your arms or legs, and it gets tired as it works harder, so there’s less power left over for other things.” 

Charles Duhigg, author of The Power Habit

A guy I worked out with in college would always set a goal to gain 10 pounds of muscle. And repeatedly, every year, he would fail. That is… until he changed his mindset. He altered the time of his workout and hit the gym before classes, and at the end of each set, he’d do a “max out” with as much weight as he could. By incorporating these new habits, not only did he gain 15 pounds of muscle instead of just 10 – but he also improved as a student by implementing a regimented working out time.

Your determination will define you, and only you can resolve to make necessary habit changes that produce a positive mindset. Motivating yourself to take control of your approach to networking will result in better outcomes as you foster valuable relationships, and ultimately help you reach your goals.