How Long Should Small Talk Last?


We all engage in small talk.

You know that polite, idle chat you have about the weather or some other trivial topic? That’s small talk. And you shouldn’t shy away from it.

That’s because while networking, small talk is the big talk.

Maybe you’re attending an event. Or at a team meeting or pitching a new client. Building meaningful relationships starts with a conversation.

So, how long should small talk last?

The answer is simple: as long as it takes! Because there is no specific length of time for small talk.

It’s an opportunity to make a good first impression. And it should go on for as long as needed to create a bond – and most importantly trust – that can essentially develop into something more.

It may come easily to some. For others, it can be challenging. Whether you consider it second nature or your worst nightmare, when you prepare for it ahead of time, it makes a difference.

While networking, small talk is the big talk.

Here are a few things to think about to help you engage in meaningful small talk.

Arm yourself with ice-breakers

Enter the room with confidence so people take notice. Be ready with effective conversation starters and topics to discuss. Doing this sets you apart from others. And there’s a right and wrong way to do it. For advice and examples that you can use immediately, I recommend that you read 7 Awful Ways to Start a Conversation

Put your elevator pitch together

Someone says, “So, tell me about yourself.” Are you ready with an answer? Having a well-thought-out response demonstrates your professionalism and skills. It’s about conveying the value you can potentially provide to others. It’s important to be able to provide something beneficial to your connections, and your pitch offers great insights. See this article about the 3 Musts for Crafting a Powerful Elevator Pitch

Be ready with questions

You want to open a conversation with small talk, but then keep the dialogue going in a positive direction with something more significant. How do you do that? You must ask good questions. And it works. You can read more about it here in my post A Trick I Learned from Tony Robbins: Ask Good Questions

Networking is about transcending connections into relationships.

Remember to listen

This is so important – you need to listen intently! And be present in the moment. This helps you earn the respect and trust of those you’re speaking with. Show you are paying attention with your body language and eye contact. Respond intelligently when appropriate. This is how you develop confidence that the connection can turn into something more meaningful. Find out more on how to raise the bar while forming relationships in this article How Do You Build a Trusted Professional Network?

Know how to end the discussion

Understanding how to get a conversation going is great. But it’s just as important to know the right way to end it. You must be good at reading other people. If their body language shows they’re not interested in what you’re saying (for example they’re avoiding eye contact) or if their responses are short and unengaging, then it’s time to move on. How do you do this gracefully, and still leave a good impression? You should read 10 Ways to Politely End a Conversation for tips on being tactful in your exit.

Networking is about transcending connections into relationships. And they have to start somewhere! And it’s usually with small talk.

Your ultimate goal while engaging in small talk is to build rapport and gain a certain level of trust. This helps you set the stage to have a meeting and deeper conversation at a later date. And it takes as long as it takes! Overall, it’s about how well you prepare for it, and how good you get at it.

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